Learning to Lose

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Yesterday, a father of one of my clients thanked me for helping his child learn to lose.   It is a skill that his child has struggled with for a while and it was causing his child to miss out on some fun play opportunities at school as other children would chose to play with other peers, rather than be at the end of his frustration if he lost.  Who wants to play if their partner is complaining about going first or about which colour they are or that they never win and that the game isn’t fair?  Who wants to listen to whining or negative comments from their partner when that person loses?

I can empathize with this client as I am a very competitive person.  I love to win and I have to use my social fake each and every time that I lose.   During our sessions, we often work on how to play games in a way that will make other people happy to play with you.  We work on taking turns, on letting other people go first, on using self talk when we lose, on making sure our reaction fits the size of the problem and on not giving up when we do lose.  This means that we need some fun games.

If you are looking for a fun game to play with your children, check out Gobblet.  I picked my copy up at Kids Books on Broadway.  It is a ramped up version of Tic Tac Toe and will keep you on your toes while having a lot of fun.  Better yet, you will win some and you will lose some.

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